pregnant or fat woman issue

Perhaps, you’re one of those commuters who don't give up your seat for pregnant women because you fear offending someone who is just overweight. It's a minefield of mixed signals, indecision, guilt and offence. All played out painfully in public on a crowded bus or train. Some people are just selfish, yes, but the average commuter would probably give up his or her seat for a pregnant woman, with good grace. It's just not that straightforward.

For a start, he might not have noticed her, and is instead lost in a book or World Cup supplement. Few people repeatedly scan for those more in need of a seat at every stop. And where does his area of responsibility end - shouting distance? Then there's that nagging doubt - is she pregnant, fat, or just wearing a baggy top?

Whatever the discomfort of offending a pregnant woman by staying seated, is it preferable to the excruciating awkwardness of effectively telling a woman, within earshot of about 20 people, that her tummy is so inflated it looks as if there's a baby inside?

The same dilemmas apply to seated women, of course, but society's expectation to be gracious still falls more heavily on men. And women, perhaps, are more adept at spotting the signs.

No wonder some passengers are frozen by agonising indecision. A survey by gurgle.com, a website owned by Mothercare, says 84% of pregnant women regularly have to stand - and one of the reasons under discussion on its message board was that seated commuters don't want to offend the non-pregnant. To help make things clear, Mothercare sells "Baby on Board" badges.